I laid awake late last night. Shut the lid of my laptop and took off my glasses. Shifted myself and situated myself under the covers. My mind couldn’t rest. I thought about all the different types of things my boyfriend and I had talked about in our 6 hour conversation. We never mean to talk so late, we both were going to bed at midnight no matter what. This never happened...the conversation was too good. We mentioned something of marriage, joking of how we’d be late to our own wedding… my mind wandered and danced of these thoughts. Where would I want it? How would it feel to look into the eyes of someone you love and make that sort of promise? I smiled to myself. My mind then drifted to my previous calculus exam. Why would you do that to me brain? You were thinking of such nice and “fluffy” thoughts, and now you’re thinking about your calc exam. You failed it, you know you did. Your professor is going to yell at you tomorrow and tell you what a disappointment you are. I looked at the clock…was 3:20 now, had been drifting for 20 minutes. Usually you don’t take this long to fall asleep, what’s the matter? Wished my boyfriend would give me a call, maybe he’s night dreaming of these same things. Is that how you would call it? It’s not the day…so you can’t be daydreaming, but you aren’t sleeping, so you can’t be dreaming. No, these were the thoughts that danced around your mind while you tried to ease yourself. Maybe you should turn the computer back on…maybe he’ll be online looking for you. No…you knew this was absurd. He’s probably already sleeping by now.

Oh what are you thinking about now. How to tell your friend you don’t see it possible to meet up with him at noon after class. You stayed up too late flirting with your boyfriend to do that. No, you’d rather go home and make up excuses to flirt with your boyfriend some more. You can’t do that, you were the one that asked him to do something. Ugh…you’ll just have to survive on this little sleep. Now you’re thinking about whether to get a piece of paper to start writing these thoughts down. No one would care about them, except maybe yourself. You decide not to get the pen. No, rather you’re going to try falling asleep. You’re done thinking about random things. It’s time to fall asleep. So how do you do that. Just turn your brain off? But you’re thinking about turning it off so you’re not turning it off! Joy…how do you fall asleep any other night? You’ve done it every single night of your life, and yet you don’t remember how to fall asleep. Incredible. You look at the clock again, 3:40. You know you’re up at 7. Did you doze off between 3 and now? Certainly your mind was filled with all sorts of thoughts, but surely they haven’t lasted this long! You must have fallen asleep for a minute or two. Now you’re yawning…you know you’re tired. However will you wake up the next morning…

You wake up, out of nowhere. Your stupid phone is making some sort of annoying noise, so you shut it off somehow. What time could it be? How much longer do you have to sleep? You look at the clock 7:01. Oh…that was your alarm. You can’t sleep any longer. Damn.